With the myriad disasters going on in the world today, I felt the theme would be appropriate. Aside from that, we all go through one form of grief and tragedy or the other. Everyday, orphans are being made, widows are created, hearts are broken and jobs are lost; just to mention a few. We need to be aware of what works and what doesn’t so that we can help ourselves and others.

In the bid to be helpful, I stumbled upon the fact that June 23, was International Widow’s day. So I decided to write over at my blog, a tribute to the widows in my life. They deal with tragedy in different facets and the widows I wrote about, they have not just overcome they have thrived!

That is my desire for you; that you continue to overcome and live a life that is full and thriving.

Thank you for reading, God bless you!

Sharon

By Jerry White

This could very well be a cry from the heart of many people today but it is also a book written by Jerry White. Life sometimes hands us more than we think we can bear; but we need to be able to stand up tall and say I Will Not Be Broken!

Jerry White, the founder or Survivor Corps and the co-recipient of a Nobel Prize has written this book for those who have come face-to-face with one disaster or the other.

Dreams get broken for so many reasons; the overall message seems to be:

Don’t let yourself get broken along with your dreams.

There are 5 Steps in I Will Not Be Broken and these are:

1. Face Facts. One must first accept the harsh reality about suffering and loss, however brutal. “This terrible thing has happened. It can’t be changed. I can’t rewind the clock. My family still needs me. So now what?”

2. Choose Life. That is, “I want to say yes to the future. I want my life to go on in a positive way.” Seizing life, not surrendering to death or stagnation, requires letting go of resentments and looking forward, not back. It can be a daily decision.

3. Reach Out. One must find peers, friends, and family to break the isolation and loneliness that come in the aftermath of crisis. Seek empathy, not pity, from people who have been through something similar. Let the people in your life into your life. “It’s up to me to reach for someone’s hand.”

4. Get Moving. Sitting back gets you nowhere. One must get out of bed and out of the house to generate momentum. We have to take responsibility for our actions. “How do I want to live the rest of my life? What steps can I take today?”

5. Give Back. Thriving, not just surviving, requires the capacity to give again, through service and acts of kindness. “How can I be an asset to those around me, and not a drain? Will I ever feel grateful again?” Yes, and by sharing your experience and talents, you will inspire others to do the same.

For more on this book and Jerry White, read the Book Review or check the website.

You can also learn more about Survivor Corps here.
Jerry White is a global survivor activist who has dedicated his life to helping victims of violent conflict. While camping in Northern Israel in 1984, he stepped on a landmine, and he spent nearly six months in Israeli hospitals learning to walk on an artificial leg. Since then, he has become a recognized leader of the historic International Campaign to Ban Landmines (winner of the 1997 Nobel Peace Prize), and a co-founder of Survivor Corps. He has testified before the US Congress and the United Nations and appeared in hundreds of media interviews and profiles.

Jerry White (I Will Not Be Broken)

I promised to share my observations and lessons as I read Jerry White’s book. I’m taking it a bit at a time; trust me, this is not a book to rush through. The lessons are deep and profound.

As I read the portion above, it struck me as a brutal truth; what is sometimes called the stark, naked truth. The desire to know is inherent in man – especially the question why. Just observe any 4 year old around you.

The whys become even more insistent when there’s been a tragedy:

• why would a God who loves us allow this to happen?

• Why should I have to be the one to suffer this way?

• Why didn’t someone do something?

• Why? Why? Why?

They are endless!

I think on some deep unconscious level, we find comfort in the unanswered whys; they give us an excuse to wallow in self pity. It’s almost as though we say to ourselves once these questions are answered, I’ll get on with my life.

However, Jerry White, in his book I Will Not Be Broken, is saying the questions will NEVER be answered. Doesn’t that give you a pause? If these questions are not going to be answered, then why ask them in the first place?

The Psalmist in the Bible constantly asked why. And he was a very troubled person – disaster after disaster seemed to trail him. When he asked why, he didn’t just address the questions to some vague, cosmic presence, he was very directional is his questioning:

“why, O Lord do you stand afar off? Why do you hide yourself in times of trouble?” (Psalm 10:1 NIV).

That is a very normal reaction. Some folks hold the opinion that we must never question God. I think that God is big enough to handle any questioning. Nevertheless, the Psalmist did not wallow in his whys…he recognised the futility of that. Some chapters later, even though there was no evidence that his questions had been answered, his attitude had changed to one of trust:

“but I trust in you unfailing love. My heart rejoices in your salvation.“

He made a conscious decision to move on with his life.

That is the bottom line. When tragedy strikes, there are usually two options:

Option 1: wallow in the futility of why;

Option 2: choose to move on…

We all experience tragedy on one level or another; the difference is in the choices. What is your choice today?